Jetting to Joy When Your Flight is Cancelled

I've spent a lot of time in airports these last couple of days. Flying internationally on a stand-by ticket is filled with crazy inconsistency and, when your focus is solely on an exciting trip ahead, it can turn joy to misery if you are not careful. Yesterday painted a vividly coloured metaphor for life. After finally getting on a flight to Washington DC, we were listed for, then bumped off, then listed for and cancelled on more than one flight.  Finally, at around 11:30 pm, we were sent to a 4 hour customer service line. It took about an hour just to collect my bag (which was checked on a flight from LA that I got bumped off of at the last minute).  With 2 days of no sleep, I still thought the situation was semi-poetic. There we all were, clinging to our baggage, exhausted, and waiting for frazzled gate agents to change our situations so that our lives can be better. Many people were vocally refusing to be consoled and cursing their situations and cursing the people there to help them. They were upset that they were not receiving immediate help or compensation they thought they deserved. They forgot that there were 600 people in the same boat as they were. They lost sight of the shore and gave into panic. Okay, maybe that was just me.  But, think about it. How many times in our lives do we "board a plane" with happiness and expectation as a destination and end up with a layover in defeat? And how many times during that layover do we only focus on ourselves and begin cursing everything (or maybe just at everything) that isn't making us feel comfortable? How many times do we cling even tighter to our baggage and desperately look to unqualified people to improve our situation so we can feel better?  When the truth is, there is joy in every airport. Although, in some airports, it might be in a terminal that's far away and so will take some work to get to. In the Dulles airport, it's in a very distant terminal. But it's there. After a night in a hotel room bed having finally gotten some sleep (thanks, mom and aunt Jenny!) we were able to regroup and pray. Pray that we get on a flight, pray for peace, and give thanks for the opportunity to even be on a trip. It gave us a chance to realize what's important in life (because once you start thanking God for things, you usually get back to the cross which puts everything in perspective). The frustration and headache is still real and still there, but there is joy in knowing that we are not in control and that the one who is in control knows how badly we want to get to our destination and always knows what's best for us. Who will be with us in every airport and gives good gifts to his kids. This all shifts perspective.  As for us now, we are stuck in a really cool city where a good friend of mine lives and has offered to be a refuge if we get stuck again. Worst case scenario is time with a good friend in our nation's Capitol.  Not too shabby. Here's to Jetting to Joy this June. Good luck with catching your flight! 

Jet to Joy June: Choosing Joy

In general, it seems that we are a people of reaction. We jump to action or inaction quickly based on an occurrence or event. Something happens that makes us feel a certain way, so we then view the world in that way, which causes us to make decisions based on that view until something else happens to change it.

I can't even count the times I've left my place in a good mood- sunglasses on, a good song playing on the radio, the world as my oyster: an amazing place full of God's grace and mercy- Life is good. Thoughts of hope and goodness filling my mind as I prepare for a good day. Then, suddenly - POP! - the bubble is burst immediately by heavy traffic, erratic drivers (not me, of course) and the rude clock that wants to shove how late I am in my face. Suddenly, life is chore. Nothing is stable. To-do lists to check off, broken relationships and fears flood my mind instead. The world is hard.

Sadly, this picture has been all-to-real in my life. This year has been a little bit different. Well...most of the time. You see, the truth is this: The world really IS hard. There will always be traffic and there will always be hardships. LAME. But the good news is that God has seen it and overcome it already. NOT LAME.

Thanks, Jesus!

I found this really cool Lion King rock that jutted pretty far out into the ocean in Laguna beach the other day. After singing a few rounds of "Ahhhhhh sabenia badadisimamo", I just stood on the rock and stared at the water. I was full of joy. 

 It was kind of a grey day and the water was choppy. The tide was pretty high and the waves crashed right up to the rock on all sides. It occurred to me that I was in the ocean. That I was right in the middle of these turbulent waters, but I was untouched (except maybe by the occasional ocean spray) and I was totally secure as long as I stayed standing on the rock.

It was a cool, real life picture of Truth. 

I guess it's just the circle of life, right?

Our circumstances and emotions change at the drop of a hat and the push of a button. They are inconsistent and, often times, turn out to be liars.  Like the waves, they can be turbulent and choppy. However, if we are standing on the Rock, then we are able to be stable and secure and have joy right in the middle of them. 

The trick is choosing to acknowledge it. I find that I often forget about the Rock and only see the water. Instead of choosing Joy, I'm tricked into actually jumping into the water of my troublesome circumstances a lot of the time. I get rocked and tossed, then somehow claw my way back onto the Rock. I have to purpose myself to choose Joy- to actively choose to focus on God's truth and grace and all that has been done for me. I have to fight for peace. And it's exhausting. But , as time goes by, it seems to get a little easier to get out of the water. It's work, but it's worth it.  Always.

Since it's Jet to Joy June, I encourage you to try to choose joy this month. The next time your mind is overwhelmed with your circumstances and you feel yourself shifting into a low gear, I encourage you to try to choose joy. To focus on even one good thing God has done for you. And repeat it to yourself over and over if you have to. Even if your circumstances stink, you can choose to cling to the rock of Truth and find some joy there. 

Here's a thought to get you started....

Good luck as you Jet to Joy this June.

Jet to Joy June: Jetting to a Dream

So the thing is, when you are out trying to make things matter, you lose track of time and, all of the sudden, it is Jet to Joy June.

May was a great month. When you begin to try and make each moment significant, it's amazing what sort of things fade to the background. I watched a lot less television (well, Netflix anyway) and spent more time with more people. I also forced myself to get off of my behind and try to get organized.

Phew! I'm glad that's over! Time to hit the Hulu queue!

Being focused and productive for things that matter can be frustrating and our circumstances can make them even more so. Finding joy in the midst of all of it is a battle, but a battle worth fighting. 

This month is Jet to Joy June in the Year of Dreams.  It is a month where, despite circumstances, joy is what will be [attempted to be] chosen. 

For me, this may be easier than some. This month (16 days to be exact) I will be jetting to Europe for a two-month long adventure. 

In case you didn't know, this is Europe.

When I was 15 years old, I dreamed of traveling to the places I learned about in history. Having visited my grandparents in Kenya when I was 10, then later visited them in Costa Rica in my teenage years, I developed the travel bug pretty early. Exploring new places and new cultures was kind of an obsession. 

At 18, I went on a mission trip to Mexico and made a new friend, who quickly became one of the closest I'll ever have. We clicked immediately and began talking of the travel adventures we would one day have together. At 18 years old,  I began a Euro-trip bank account. An external savings account that paid a little more than average interest and would take three days for me to get any money out of it (preventing me from frivolous spending). The account spent most of it's life with under a $500 balance that would get depleted for car maintenance or college textbooks or lab fees...etc...) and replenished when I'd get an extra babysitting job or with Christmas money. 

And then it grew.  I set a tentative date for "the summer after I graduate college". Well, that summer is here and, a couple of weeks ago, I transferred all of the money from that account into my main checking account and began booking hostels and transportation. 

It's happening.

The very friend I shared a bunk bed with, cracking jokes and dreaming of traveling Europe with 7 years ago will be my travel-buddy for half of the trip. We will be joined by another mutual friend, making it even more fun.

Not to mention, God has been opening doors for this trip all over the place. The power of Global Community is being witnessed through the planning of this trip. Friends, friends of friends, friends of friends of friends, and even safe and helpful strangers have generously opened up their homes to give us a place to stay in many of the cities we are visiting. 

And so here is the itinerary 16 days out:

June 22-28: South Germany

June 28-July 4: South England (the third of our trio meets us here)

July 4- July 20: Driving a Rental Car throughout Northern England, Scotland, and throughout Ireland (after a ferry ride), then back to London via Wales - Staying with friends, friends of friends, couchsurfing and in a cabin or treehouse at a protest site.

July 20-24: Rome (both of my travel companions fly back to the US on the 24)- Couchsurfing

July 24-30: Florence- staying at a Camping Hostel

July 30-Aug 2: Vienna - Couchsurfing

Aug 2-4: Salzburg - Hostel

August 4-10: Paris- Couchsurfing and Friend

August 10-13: Bruges - Couchsurfing

August 13-16: Amsterdam - Hostel 

Two months. One dream. 

It will be easy to Jet to Joy this June.

Hopefully it will not be too difficult for you, either. 

Make it Matter May : It All Matters When You're On Assignment

When looking at the most recently released images of Earth, it is hard not to feel like a tiny, insignificant speck aimlessly wandering about this gigantic round orb in this even more gigantic universe. It's daunting to think of all of the people living on it that we are supposed to love and care about. 

Hey look, there I am!

A glance at that makes me, momentarily at least, wonder if I really matter at all. Yesterday I went to work, talked on the phone, bought a rotisserie chicken at Ralph's, took a nap, went to the gym with my roommate, ate dinner, got in my Batman PJ's and finished Downton Abbey (my life is super exciting, I know). I thought I had a pretty productive day until I saw that picture. 

The news website that contained the picture also had headlines of prison camps in North Korea, of famine in Darfur, of riots in Istanbul, of the underground sex trade all over the world and of the potential of an impending economic collapse of the EU. Of celebrities marrying teenagers, of moral leaders falling to corruption, of free speech leading to prison, of schools being invaded by the state...the list goes on and on. 

The thought of fitting that whole messed up planet into my tiny heart makes my head spin. In a way, it makes me want to call it impossible now and throw in the towel. To not pressure myself into doing "the right thing" because what I (this tiny insignificant speck that is too small to be located on the satellite image of Earth) do doesn't really affect the world anyway.  To buy this T-shirt to notify everyone of my position.

Honesty is the best policy.

But then I think of Jesus. A savior who could fit the whole world into His heart and who could love each messed up person as if they were whole world. 

It got me wondering what the heck I'm supposed to be doing here. So I googled it. In the image section, this picture kept popping up.

Thanks, Google. 

Normally these types of things gross me out and I discount them as cheesy bumper stickers, but I clicked further in and was lead to this verse: " Nevertheless, each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them." 1 Corinthians 7:17. 

The whole idea of being "assigned" to my situation was one that I had never thought about before. I started to think- well what the heck is my assignment then? To work, to talk on the phone, to buy chicken, to run? I'm kind of a procrastinator, is this an assignment I can do the night before? Does it really matter? 

While worrying about figuring out the assignment and if I'm doing anything that matters to it, a thought occurred to me.  Secret agents go on assignment. Adventuring Archaeologists go on assignment. Superheroes go on assignment. And suddenly the thought was exciting. 

What does someone on assignment do but take cues from his or her boss and represent the agency they work for while on the field? And not every assignment is somewhere super exciting. And not every assignment is one full of intrigue or international espionage. But it is important to the boss and the boss' agency, so the one who's on assignment (hopefully) follows the instructions and gets the job done while representing their agency well. 

The correlation here is obvious, I think...

Black Widow totally wears glasses.

Everything we do matters. We were assigned to our position- whether it be as a student, a mom, a hobo, a business person, a teacher, a friend, a barista, a struggling single, a traveller, a butcher a baker or a candlestick maker. It's easy to look at others around us and to think that what they're doing is more significant. But really, we should just be focused on our own assignment and putting our efforts into staying in tune with the Boss. And to make sure that we are representing the Agency well when we are buying chicken at Ralph's or at the gym with our friends.

And to be open to the Boss' instructions. You are not an accident, so your circumstances (as hard or mundane as they may seem sometimes) are not accidental either. To quote the great philosopher Gandalf "All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."

By deciding to follow and to trust that the Boss knows best and will never leave us or forsake us, we are deciding to make our time matter. We are deciding to work for and represent the ultimate Agency. To wear the uniform of Redeemed and represent it to the world while buying chicken. And, just like agents in the field, it may often seem like there is a lull in action, but we must use those times to rest and prepare and always be ready to go when we get the signal. 

And, to "Bloom Where We're Planted". Our location and our sphere of influence is intentional. Our neighbors, our friends, our delivery people, even our annoying check-out people at the store. By blooming where we are, instead of waiting for more interesting soil, we are being a source of beauty and inspiration for those around us. Isn't that what a flower is supposed to do? To remind us of the beauty in the world and point us to admiration of the gardener? 

Whether you are a flower or an agent (or a flagent), take heart and take pride in knowing that everything you do for  the Boss or the Gardener (or the Gardenoss) is significant because you were assigned to bloom in it. 

Here's to Mattering this Make it Matter May! 

Make it Matter May: Making Your Pain Matter

Sunday, May 6, was a big day.  For me, it was  a mile-marker in the Year of Dreams. The Pediatric Cancer Foundation holds an annual race in Irvine to raise money for pediatric cancer research. I have been training to do the 10K without passing out since February. And on Sunday, I did just that.

Unable to sleep, I was up at about 5AM getting dressed for the race. Adrenaline and excitement fueled me through the start line but,  a little more than halfway through the run, things got more difficult. 

There I was, aching all over, out of energy and the finish line seemed like forever away. Then, out of nowhere, a thought popped into my head:

"Kind of like last year, huh?"

And the symbolism of the race hit me and I actually began to cry a little...

About 4 years ago, a tough set of complex circumstances left me without a place to live. I went to stay for a week at the home of some close family friends, Mike and Erin, and ended up staying for about two and a half years. 

When I moved in, I unknowingly had a bullet-proof shell around my heart. Outside of immediate family, I did not truly love or trust anyone. For me, love and trust was not safe and, honestly, I'm not sure I knew how to do it properly. So, moving in with these people I admired was scary. What if they decided they really didn't like me after knowing me? What if I'm too much? What if I make their life bad? What if What if What if? 

Although they had never given me any reason to doubt, the fact that they were adult people who I had loved as much as I could at the time and people who I felt like might want to leave when I was too much, I kept myself pretty guarded for quite a long time. Aren't feelings just the greatest?

However, there was another in the household. He was 2 and a half at the time and the funniest kid you ever met. I had watched him grow and seen him weekly since he was born, but this was different. We were neighbors now (his room was next to mine). It took next to no time for me to truly love Cade. He always was a special kid. He would get jokes way beyond him, he would engage adults in conversations, and had this very matter-of-fact, sure-of-himself way of looking at the world. We laughed at the same things, had a lot of the same interests and genuinely had a lot of fun. The Kid had melted his way through the bullet proof glass and given me a soft-spot in my heart. In a weird way, this kid who was too young to even go to school taught me how to love. 

Circa 2008

Here he was, not only a kid (where as kids don't normally judge, reject or expect you to be anything in particular), but an amazing and unique kid who was actually fun to hang around with. Who could be safer to love than that?

Fast forward 3 years. Through their love and dedication, I left Mike and Erin's house a different person then when I came in. It was more complex and took a little longer than with Cade, but I loved trusted them (still do) as friends, mentors, and second parents (or as I like to call it-  Frentarents). 

My stubborn heart had new occupants. As it's landlord, my brain had done everything in its power to check and double-check that the occupants were safe. Jesus was there, too. And as Mr. Beaver says about Aslan in The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe : "Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King, I tell you."

Through the next year, I would learn first-hand just what Mr. Beaver was talking about.

The day after I got to hold Lucy, Cade's little sister, for the first time, (who, by the way, gained automatic heart-occupancy), I got a call from Erin saying that something was seriously wrong with Cade and that they think there might be a lesion on his brain. After getting off of the phone, I laid up in my squeaky loft bed and cried for the first time in 10 years. Throughout the next month, a tumor would be discovered, two intense brain surgeries would be performed, and a stroke would occur leading to temporary paralysis. A constant stream of words like "life in peril, risky, dangerous, unknown" all describing Cade and the family's situation was terrifying. It was the most painful thing I had experienced to date.

While Mike and Erin were dealing with everything in prayer and in God-  making their pain matter- even going as far as encouraging countless others in proclaiming that "God is Good All the Time" during the most difficult time in their lives, I was not handling it in the same way. 

I was not being helpful to anyone and was taking my pain and laying in it. Swimming in it. Drowning in it. Trying to run and escape from it.  I was raging at God. I felt tricked. I spent years building the wall around my heart. Growing up I had loved so many that went away or ended up being a source of pain.  The wall, the bullet proof glass was supposed to protect me from that. I spent a long time in "This wasn't supposed to happen! He was safe! They were safe! Why would You to this to them? To him? To me?" 

Then whispers of the enemy: He's just showing you that you aren't supposed to love. He's just showing you that you aren't worth that. 

And I almost believed it. For many months, I did not make my pain matter. I tried to run from it. To escape. I almost let it go to waste and almost let myself waste away with it. 

A little over a year and hundreds of freedoms later, I see things differently. While all of that still hurt and there are sometimes twinges of residual pain, I am able to clearly see that God is in the business of making ugly things beautiful. I am able to see how many people are being reached by Cade's story. How much good is being done with something that seemed so bad. In myself, I am seeing broken walls in my heart. Walls that I thought were protecting it, but were really holding it captive. Love is able to pour in and flow out like it never was before.

And on Sunday, wearing a Team Cade T-shirt, I ran a 10K for Cade. Like last year, each step was work. And, interestingly enough, like last year, I got a little lost, zig-zagged and added an extra loop to the race, making it 1.2 miles longer than it should have been. 

Yeah, those lines are supposed to be straight. 

But it was worth it. Each exhausted and aching step mattered, taking me closer to the finish line. When I finally got there, there were several people there cheering. Fellow Team Cade runners, the Frentarents and, best of all, Cade. 

At 3, the kid taught me how to love. At 6, he taught me how to hope. Fingers crossed for flying lessons at 9. 

I have learned that if we allow God to use our pain and painful situations, He will use it to free and shape us and to show others His goodness. Life is full of difficulties, so pain is inevitable. We can waste it and wallow or we can allow God to Make it Matter.   

Good luck and Godspeed as you learn to Make it Matter this May!

Make it Matter May: April Resistance brings May Persistence?

Before diving into Make it Matter May, let me reiterate: Adjust Your Attitude April was, by far, the most difficult month so far in the Year of Dreams. However, if mastered, the month could be the most beneficial to carry out throughout the rest of the year (and life). 

In this month that I have struggled so much with, I have also learned the most.  One of the most glaring lessons was this:

When you posture yourself and declare outwardly an adjustment (in life or in attitude) towards things that are positive and good, you WILL be met with resistance.

In personal experience and in many conversations with others this month I have pinpointed 3 kinds of resistance you will encounter.

1) Self-resistance 

This type of resistance is one of our most primal and obvious. Sadly, a lot of things that are good for us take effort and are not self-serving. Dang. For some reason, much of our self-centered tendencies are left over from baby-dom. Instead of pushing through resistance to our goal, we sit and cry about it in our own filth. Think of how many more cookies you would have snagged if you'd only collected yourself and seen that the lower cabinet shelving makes an excellent stepladder.

2) Enemy-resistance:

So when you declare a change in attitude or in life that leads to freedom, the enemy is pretty P.O'd. The fact that you are working to break a chain that you didn't realize was there before means that he loses footing in your life. Not his favorite, so he will make sure there is resistance. Hoping you will fail, he is ready to convict, blame and taunt you as soon as you fall to his resistance.  He will use all of your weaknesses and everything that has worked in the past. Prepare yourself. Knowing what is going on is half of the battle. The good news is that all of it is happening under God's watch, so He knows you can handle it or will step in if it is too hard and you ask Him to.  

3)God- resistance: 

Once you declare something with your words, it seems like God wants you to put your feet to it. Have you ever said "I'm going to be a more gracious person today" and then said some very unkind words to those...rude...people on the freeway five minutes later? Oh, me either. It seems like these situations have two benefits. The first benefit is it acts as a mirror, showing us who we really are despite what we declare we are. This isn't to put us down, but to show us how much we really need God to persevere. The next  benefit is the practicing of our faith. Sometimes it takes a lot of small things like not going crazy on rude people in traffic everyday to be be able to handle bigger things later like being wronged by a friend or family member. Baby steps.

Or baby-weights. 

Despite all of this resistance, freedom is a cause worth fighting for. When you adjust your attitude and continue on with it despite your obstacle, you becoming stronger. And, just like with exercise- the stronger you get, the easier it becomes and the more you are able to handle. 

But now it is Make it Matter May of the Year of Dreams. It's easy to get stuck in routine and the mundane workings of daily life. This month will be focused on turning those things (even if that just means changing how we see them) into things that will matter in the long run. Since you matter to God, what you do is significant, too. We get so trapped in our worries that we are paralyzed and sometimes rendered ineffective. We get so wrapped up in people and comparisons that we begin to believe what we do is insignificant. We get so consumed with our own need for comfort that we do as little as possible to get through the tasks put in front of us. Now is the time to try and combat that. To begin to realize that there's more to life then what you see and more to offer then you realized. 

Time to Make it Matter this May!